Perspective

So I found out that I got released off a hold on one of the jobs.  It was the print one.  The casting director was kind enough to write me.  She said they had decided to go all Chinese.  I'm Korean.  Nothing I can do about that, right?

image via totalbeauty.com

My people mixed with white on left, My people full on right, middle: not my people

I can see how this could be a Godsend for people who find out they don't get booked and analyze every single possible reason why they didn't get booked.  That's not fun.

There are so many arbitrary reasons that could have come into play that you really must not get down about it.  For example, could you imagine if the casting director didn't tell me and I knocked myself for not booking it, attacking myself for not being good enough. And all along, I wouldn't have been able to change a thing. Right?

Honestly, I don't get too disappointed when I'm released off a hold. It's strange. Once I get a callback or am on hold, I feel like I'm on cloud nine.  I am so happy and grateful that I even got that far that it doesn't bother me much if I don't actually book it.  I know...I'm an amateur.  I remember my agent telling me I got my very first commercial callback and that I was on hold (she probably didn't know it was my first). I was thrilled. My agent: "Sweetie, you know you didn't book it yet, right?  You sound a little too happy about a hold." Look, this girl can get really giddy.

I think I tend to be more hard on myself if I do horribly during the audition and don't even get a callback, especially if it's a legit (film/TV/stage) one rather than a commercial audition or print casting. In general, I feel like commercial and print are really about a certain look, whereas legit takes talent (usually) into consideration.  So the "talent pride" can get a little hurt.  But I'm learning not to be so critical of myself.  I'm learning to enjoy the process and focus less on the results.

I will be finding out about the commercial job soon.  Of course, it'd be absolutely fantastic to get it.  But whatever happens, I am taking away the good from it.  How fun the audition and callback was.  Being able to chat with another actor with whom I went to high school.  Feeling comfortable in the audition room. All plusses.

Even though I didn't book this print job, the bonus was getting to meet the casting director and having her write that she'd keep me on file.  For next time.  Isn't that nice?  We always have the opportunity of next time.  =)


PS. You didn't think I'd share just the "successes", right? C'mon. This blog category is entitled "That's Life", and life doesn't always go perfectly the way you want it.  I want to share the realities of my life, and also, the really fun part of sometimes thinking things didn't go your way, but realizing later, that it was the best way to go!